response to the one that got away upon being pressed Part 1

"You didn't need to write more unless you needed to get it out," she wrote with a poor emoji gritting its teeth. "I can take it," she encouraged with the endearing LOL

Well

I guess I could let it out in fits and starts if you really want the criticism

It didn't last long enough to be considered a 'relationship'--there

    I hated that

But was that anyone's fault? Hm?

(I do consider you an "ex" in my mind when relationships come up in conversation

    with friends and people I date.

    What do you think about that, huh?)

Oh, and I really miss your cat!

I really don't miss your dog

    (I was just a sex object to him)

I'm a dog person, so that was a big deal for me!

But I was very sad to lose your cat's friendship

Yeah, I suppose it's possible there's a lot to take out on you

But

It's also possible that maybe you weren't as bad an experience for me as you're afraid you were?

You

I imagine a parallel universe where we’re still together—

We’d get out of the shower, naked, intoxicated with each other, completely intertwined.

What would be different is that I would wipe the fogged mirror and point to your reflection and say

I love that girl.

Because I did.

No doubt you would have responded in that coo-ey, sexy way you have

“And she loves you.”

But I would have said, trying to guide your eyes to your own reflection

No babe, that’s not what I’m going for.

How do you feel about that girl? Do you love her too?

I realize now that I have no idea what you would have said.

I know that if you could have said ‘yes’

And I could have believed you

It would have made my job so much easier.